The diagram shows how rainwater is collected for the use of drinking water in a Australian city.
The diagram illustrates how an Australian town collects
rainwater
to process in order to use as drinking water
.
Overall
, rainwater
collected from houses can be used for drinking after it has been processed by being filtered and then
being
treated with chemicals.
Unnecessary verb
apply
Initially
, the rain which falls on the rooftop is collected by the gutter and then
runs down the pipe at the side of the house into the drain at the bottom. Each house collects rainwater
in this
way and the rainwater
is then
passed along underground drains to the water
filter.
The rainwater
passes through the water
filter to remove any impurities. Once it has been filtered, it continues along the pipes to a storage tank. From this
point, the water
goes from storage to the
Correct article usage
apply
water
treatment. At this
stage of the process, the water
is treated with chemicals in order to make it fit for consumption. When the water
is ready for drinking, it travels along pipes that lead back into the houses in the town where people can use the water
for daily consumption.Submitted by dmdeemanthakasun on
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rainwater, water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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