Prision is a common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to give people with a better education. Do you agree or disagree?
Prison is a place to give punishment for
criminals
. Use synonyms
Moreover
, for the solution of offences, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
method
has been used by various nations. Use synonyms
although
, Linking Words
education
is a useful Use synonyms
method
to solve issues. I disagree with Use synonyms
this
notion. Linking Words
This
essay will articulate predominant reasons for disagreement, Linking Words
along with
a relevant conclusion.
To commence with ,Linking Words
education
influences
individuals ,who are doing criminal activities for self-rescue and humankind who are born to do the Use synonyms
crime
, teaching is not successful, Use synonyms
for example
, years ago, a woman named Jolly who has a criminal mind engaged in the murder of family members for assets .Linking Words
This
kind of Linking Words
people
never change their attitude, they have more tendency to kill mankind unnecessarily. So in my opinion, Use synonyms
education
is not effective.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, Linking Words
imprisonment
and death sentence is the best Use synonyms
method
to mitigate crimes. The person who commits a Use synonyms
crime
should be given life Use synonyms
imprisonment
. It may lead to repentance. But it is not possible for all Use synonyms
people
. Some never change their mentality. To epitome, after Use synonyms
imprisonment
, some Use synonyms
criminals
are involved in crimes to earn money. Nowadays numerous famous Use synonyms
people
utilise them for their needs.The government should impose life Use synonyms
imprisonment
for Use synonyms
this
kind of Linking Words
people
. Ultimately, the Use synonyms
crime
rate will decrease. So in between these Use synonyms
people
, Use synonyms
education
is not an effective Use synonyms
method
.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, some Linking Words
people
have different opinions regarding Use synonyms
imprisonment
and
Use synonyms
education
. Use synonyms
Education
would not influence
Use synonyms
criminals
. After Use synonyms
education
, if the government releases Use synonyms
criminals
would be involved in more criminal activities. In my opinion, lockup is the best Use synonyms
method
to reduce the Use synonyms
crime
. so the government should encourage Use synonyms
imprisonment
and the death penalty in our country. So I disagree with Use synonyms
this
statementLinking Words
Submitted by saniyasunny1848 on
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Task Response
Work on improving the clarity and structure of your argument throughout the essay. The introduction could be more engaging, and clearer transitions between paragraphs are needed to guide the reader through your ideas more smoothly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Strive for higher precision in grammar and vocabulary to enhance the clarity and effectiveness of your communication. Avoid repetition and be mindful of sentence structure to avoid confusion. Reading more academic essays or articles on similar topics may help.
Task Response
Develop your main points more fully, incorporating more detailed examples and explanations. This will help make a more compelling and comprehensive case for your argument. Including counterarguments and addressing them can also strengthen your essay.
Task Response
Your introduction clearly states your position on the topic, which sets a clear expectation for the reader. This is a good practice and helps in guiding the essay in a focused direction.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have made a conscious effort to include examples to support your points, which demonstrates an understanding of the need to back up arguments with evidence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.