Nowadays, older people who need employment have to compete with younger people. What problems does this cause and what are the Solutions?

#people #employment

this

era that we are living

Change preposition

in, younger

show examples

younger

Correct article usage

the younger

show examples

generation

seek

Change the verb form

seeks

show examples

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

golden opportunities in the business market which could lead to the competition between

young

Add an article

the young

a young

show examples

and old generation

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

could cause a few problems. One of the main issues which could occur is that when managers want to hire

new

Correct article usage

a new

show examples

workforce, they have to choose between experienced

workers

and young

workers

. On

this

account, it is a hard decision to make as both groups could be as qualified as each other for

this

vacancy. To illustrate, on one hand, the manager can use the experience of older

workers

and

on the other hand

, youngsters are

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

stimulant to the

job

because they are more active and they could get things done faster.

Therefore

, choosing between these two groups can be a problem and mischoosing could

contributes

Change the verb form

contribute

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

disappointment for each employee and

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

could

leads

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

to putting them in

wrong

Add an article

the wrong

show examples

place.

Also

this

can put

Correct your spelling

show examples

Add an article

the obstacle

an obstacle

show examples

obstacle

Fix the agreement mistake

obstacles

show examples

in the work process.

Hence

, employers have to pick out among oldsters and youngsters that could make stiff conditions in that business. To solve

this

problem, employers have to categorize their priorities for hiring new

workers

to make the right decision for each position.

Firstly

, they have to put in order the quality of each workforce

Change preposition

in.

show examples

For instance

, for

high rank

Add a hyphen

high-rank

show examples

jobs

Add a comma

,jobs

show examples

they have to consider the work experience element as it is very important and for

low

Add a hyphen

low-job

show examples

job

positions

Add a comma

,positions

show examples

managers might look into the best quality of each volunteer.

This

could give a chance to younger ones and in some cases,

boss

Add an article

the boss

a boss

show examples

could ignore their background. Eventually, making the right decision is an important task that every employer

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

to manage. In conclusion, putting every individual in the correct

job

position can avoid serious problems in the

job

market.

Submitted by mshirzadm77 on Fri Feb 10 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

298 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is widely believed that schools should allow students to learn from films, computers and games instead of books. Personally, I can neither completely agree nor disagree with this statement for a variety of reasons.
5.5
band
Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.
It is widely known that in some countries the government assists the elderly citizens by providing financial help, in other parts of the world the families take up this role. This essay will analyse both arguments and give reasons why it is the duty of the family to take care of the elderly or retired population.
4
band
Band 6+: At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays in some countries, the population includes a majority of young adults, compared with a number of older people. In my opinion, I consider that a bigger number of young adults can bring about more advantages for a country compared to any problems they might bring.
6.5
band
International tourism is now more common than ever before. Some feel that this is a positive trend, while others do not. what are your opinion on this?
In the modern era of tourism one of the burning issues today is external holidaymakers which has markedly increased. Increasing levels of tourists have proved to be more commonplace than ever before for humanity in the 21st century. While a number of people argue that this cannot be true. Despite the many advantages of external tourism that derive from this arrangement, I totally agree that external holidaymakers are more commonplace even than before, and increasing this could be fruitful for the current economic climate and tourism industry. These will be looked at and analyzed to prove this thesis true.
7
band
People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?
It is undoubtedly true that people living in metropolitan cities nowadays face a plethora of issues in their daily lives. The biggest problem is that the increasing population moving to the city leads to many major problems such as crime and poverty. To tackle this dilemma, the government should plan meticulously before encouraging people to move to smaller areas.

Nowadays, older people who need employment have to compete with younger people. What problems does this cause and what are the Solutions?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.

Band 6+: At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

International tourism is now more common than ever before. Some feel that this is a positive trend, while others do not. what are your opinion on this?

People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?