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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors.

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors.
The pie charts illustrate the advantages and disadvantages of Bowen island depending on the survey the visitors have done.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that the most common disadvantage is the high cost of living
while
Linking Words
 the most common advantage is the people who live there. First of all,
according to
Linking Words
 the visitors' opinion, the most popular disadvantage is spending
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
 money on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
living
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 reached 50%. Another disadvantage of the island is the entertainment as it stood at 25%.
According to
Linking Words
 the weather and food quality, they were slightly similar to each other as they reached 15% and 10%, respectively. Second of all, the residents who live there were at the top of the most common advantages reaching 42%. Interestingly, the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scenery in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Bowen island was lower than the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of people by 7%. The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of the culture was exactly 12% which was slightly higher than the good accommodation. Good accommodation followed good accommodation by getting the least
percentage
Use synonyms
 among the other advantages which was 11%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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