IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that in order to continue improving the quality of high school education, students should be encouraged to evaluate and criticize their teachers. Others, however, believe that this would result in the loss of discipline for teachers. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #quality #school #education #students #teachers #loss #discipline
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent decades, it has been argued that teenagers in educational institutions ought to have opportunities to evaluate and criticize to improve the quality of
school
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 some people claim that
students
Use synonyms
 could be less disciplined than
teachers
Use synonyms
 in
school
Use synonyms
 classes because of the evaluation
system
Use synonyms
 I strongly believe that youngsters should become critics to enhance learning processes.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, it is a fact that
students
Use synonyms
 are likely to make the degree of the educational
system
Use synonyms
 of high
school
Use synonyms
 improved by providing criticism or judgement since they are the learners who are directly connected with the educators.
For example
Linking Words
, as the
education
Use synonyms
 department allows youngsters to examine learning processes and provides suggestions about
teachers
Use synonyms
 in high schools in South Korea, their satisfaction level
as well as
Linking Words
 the quality of high
school
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 have been enormously enhanced in
school
Use synonyms
 classes.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is significantly essential for teenagers to provide
feedback
Use synonyms
 about
teachers
Use synonyms
 in order to contribute to improving educational systems in high schools.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it cannot be denied that
students
Use synonyms
 could abuse
this
Linking Words
feedback
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 negatively.
For instance
Linking Words
, because most of the surveys of
feedback
Use synonyms
 systems in high schools are anonymous, there are some
students
Use synonyms
 who utilize the
feedback
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 in a bad way.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is comparatively difficult to figure out whether the evaluation and criticism of
teachers
Use synonyms
 are the truth or not.
Due to
Linking Words
 these facts, educators will be taking an action against
students
Use synonyms
 carefully and
this
Linking Words
 circumstance will result in the loss of discipline for
teachers
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
,
feedback
Use synonyms
 programs for educators should be progressed prudently. In conclusion, In my opinion, even though there are some disadvantages to the evaluation
system
Use synonyms
, I strongly suggest that the acquisition of
students
Use synonyms
'
feedback
Use synonyms
 will be the most effective way to obtain direct criticism about
teachers
Use synonyms
 to enhance the quality of high
school
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mix5777 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • evaluate
  • critique
  • feedback
  • teaching quality
  • interactive classroom
  • empower
  • motivation
  • engagement
  • authority
  • discipline
  • respect
  • demoralized
  • constructive feedback
  • biased
  • objective observations
  • multifaceted approach
  • peer evaluations
  • professional development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: