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Band 7

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
In the contemporary era, with the evolving social landscape, people’s perspectives on lifestyles have significantly diverged. The question of whether people should accept dissatisfaction with their work and inadequate income or strive to improve their circumstances has become a matter of considerable debate.
This
 essay will outline both viewpoints, and I believe that transforming these situations contributes to enhancing
overall
 well-being. On one hand, advocates of maintaining the status quo argue that excessive expectations and unrealistic imaginations lead to greater disappointment.
Therefore
, individuals should accept a low salary and job dissatisfaction, going with the flow to avoid overthinking and aggression and have a simpler and potentially more peaceful
life
.
Moreover
, if people stay in an adverse situation and still look at the bright side, it demonstrates excellent adaptability and resilience, which can be seen as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 admirable trait.
On the other hand
, some proponents contend that individuals should make an effort to improve their struggling situations by enhancing their skills and professional qualifications to apply for a desirable job, which brings a higher level of income and
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
. These changes not only improve individuals' lives,
such
 as their mental health, standard of living, and sense of security, but
also
 provide peace of mind.
Additionally
, financial stability supports people in doing more of what they are passionate about, paving the way for happiness and a successful
life
. For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that accepting adverse circumstances may a less complicated
life
,
while
 it takes a toll on the possibility of a colourful
life
.
As a result
, improving the situation would be the correct decision in the long run, as it can lead to a better and more meaningful
life
.
Submitted by zora840810 on

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task achievement
Try incorporating more specific examples to substantiate your points. This adds depth and credibility to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Be cautious with grammatical consistency and word choice to maintain fluency and coherence throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay features a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the issue and summarizing the main arguments.
task achievement
The arguments presented are logically structured and fairly well-developed, reflecting a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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