IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Scientists believe that computers will become more intelligent than human beings. Some people find it a positive development while others think it is negative development. Discuss both points and give your own opinion.

#scientists #computers #beings #people #development #points
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There were always controversial arguments regarding artificial
intelligence
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.
While
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 some
people
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 think that computers should never be developed to be smarter than humans, others oppose it and say it is a positive advancement. In
this
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 essay, I will argue both perspectives
as well as
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 elucidate why I believe
this
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 development is crucial for humanity. On the one hand,
people
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 who are against artificial
intelligence
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, they assuming that computer evolution will replace
people
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's vacancies, and
as a result
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 of that, many
people
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 will find themselves jobless, which is the case in some countries at present time, as a clear example China, China had substituted a number of medical staff with
robots
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, the mentioned
robots
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 can conduct many medical procedures starting with a straightforward process like blood collecting from patients and ending with complicated operations just like eyes surgery.
Furthermore
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, these
robots
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 could be hazardous to humankind somehow,
for instance
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, fictional movies that predict,
robots
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 that are used in wars, could turn against humanity as it has independent thinking
in other words
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 artificial
intelligence
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.
On the other hand
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, the side that encourages artificial
intelligence
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, including me, as those computers have the ability to perform extremely complicated calculations and resolve complex issues on behalf of humanity.
for example
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, developed high-quality computers liable to perform complicated steps to predict crises in advance
such
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 as hurricanes, floods and earthquakes.
in addition
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,
this
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 development can contribute to advancements in science, especially, in discovering space.
Finally
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, Computer
intelligence
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 plays a vital role in our lives enhancement, despite the downsides that come alongside these advancements, I believe the artificial
intelligence
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 revolution has outstanding benefits.
Submitted by hayderhayder on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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