Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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The divorce rate has risen in the past few years, some socialists claim that it is the result of excessive choices. From a personal perspective, I disagree with the former argument, believing that opportunities are still limited by traditional thoughts in society.

To begin

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with,

although

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compared with the past, there are more job opportunities provided, new graduates are constrained to intelligent work because of job discrimination.

For example

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, I have a friend who is interested in handicrafts, yet she is forced to enter a college to obtain a scholarship

that is

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irrelevant to her interest. Apparently, becoming a carpenter is not a respected job in Taiwan and there are more blue-collar jobs which are deemed low-class and most workers would avoid choosing them. Another reason that leads to constrained chances is the unbalanced development between the urban and the countryside.

For instance

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, The salary level of Taipei, which is the capital of Taiwan, is significantly higher than in Tainan.

As a result

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, many youngsters swarm into Taipei to get

highly-paid

Correct your spelling

highly paid

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jobs rather than staying in their hometown.

Similarly

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, the medical condition of a city is

also

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a contributing factor. Families with the elderly would prefer to live in big cities to get better medical care.

In other words

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, the residences are highly restricted by the developments of the place. In conclusion, though some socialists might think there are abundant choices for people, some decision-making processes are greatly confined

due to

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discrimination and financial or medical conditions. Perhaps after fixing all possible faults, the way of making decisions can be more free and diverse.

qooe212156822000Wed Apr 19 2023

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task response

Ensure that you fully address the prompt and present a clear viewpoint on the statement. Make sure to provide a balanced argument and consider both perspectives.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is good, but ensure a more balanced treatment of ideas and a clearer progression of arguments from one paragraph to the next.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

overwhelmed
decision fatigue
paralysis by analysis
consumerism
globalization
personal autonomy
market saturation
option overload
decision-making process
psychological well-being
buyer's remorse
customization
trade-offs
minimalism
information superhighway

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