As major cities around the world are growing, so are their problems. What are these problems for young people living in cities? What are possible solutions for these problems?

Now in the 21st
century
Add a comma
,century
show examples
the world is developing as fast as possible. At the same time, the population is
also
growing. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
we will discuss how a growing population affects the universe. And as
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
our peace grows and improves the problems in our system
also
increase.
Firstly
,
according to
statistics calculated at the Harvard Institute, the number of people who smoke is increasing every year, which
also
has a significant impact on our environment.
Secondly
,
along with
the development of
mobile
Add an article
the mobile
a mobile
show examples
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
, the number of cars whose exhaust smoke spoils
our
Change the word
the
show examples
air that we breathe is
also
increasing. In conclusion, I would like to say that if humanity switches to a more healthy and active lifestyle,
then
our world would improve noticeably in a fairly short period of time. Please do not be indifferent to the world in which the next generation will live, because the future state of our home depends on them.
Submitted by ina1_95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: