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Writing Samples
Band 6

modern lifestyles mean that many parents have little time for their children .many children suffer because they donnot get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past. Do you agree or disagree?

#lifestyles #parents #time #children #donnot #attention
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In
this
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 modern era, people are running with hectic schedules.
Therefore
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, people have less time for
children
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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,
children
Use synonyms
 suffer from mental problems, they are not able to get attention from their
parents
Use synonyms
 compared to the past year. In
this
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 essay, I will elaborate on more details and
thus
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 lead to a logical conclusion. First of all,
children
Use synonyms
 are facing so many difficulties in their environment, and they are able to share the routine life with their
parents
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. It increases the gaps between
parents
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 and
children
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.
Furthermore
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,
children
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 are getting low grades in the academic records because there's no help from
parents
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 to clear their doubts.
In addition
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,
parents
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 don't even have time to attend the annual events.
According to
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 a recent survey conducted by BBC Channel, more than 40% of
children
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 complain about their parent's attention.
Nevertheless
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, it is evidently clear that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
catering
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the needed love and attention to
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
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 plays a major role in their emotional development; it helps them significantly to be healthy adults down the road.To illustrate, teenagers strive to care and benevolence more than materialistic items for their emotional
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
.
For instance
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,
this
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 has
scientifically
Add a missing verb
been scientifically
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 proven by
a
Correct article usage
apply
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research conducted by Cambridge University which emphasizes the fact that successful and wealthy people have caring
parents
Use synonyms
 who kept an eye on them.
Thus
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, they grow up confident and secure. In conclusion, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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light of what
have
Change the verb form
has
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 been discussed above.
However
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,
parents
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 have too much responsibility, they should not ignore their
offsprings'
Change noun form
offspring's
show examples
 desires and they have to strike a balance between their personal and practical life
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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