IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8.5

You have borrowed something from your friend and it has got damaged. Write a letter to a friend. In your letter, apologize for damaging the product/stuff explain what happened say how are you going to fix the issue

#friend #product #stuff
Dear Maria, Sorry, it's taking me so long to write to you but it's necessary to tell you that your watch which I borrowed from you
last
 meeting is broken down. To be honest, when I was washing my hands, some water escaped into it. I
also
 didn't know that it was not a waterproof one. So, sometimes it works and the rest of the time, it doesn't work.
In addition
, It is difficult to Know the time using it.
Furthermore
, a few spots of rust appeared on its band.
Therefore
, I will take it to the shop where you buy it from to ask about the ability to repair it and clean its band, or I will buy a new one from the same brand for you.
Also
, you can take my new watch which my mom gave me when I succeeded in high school and you like it a lot. I hope you will accept my apology. All the best. Amal
Submitted by amalalhoury on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and purpose, which will enhance the flow of information and maintain the reader’s interest throughout.
Task Achievement
While expressing regret, providing solutions or compensations can significantly strengthen your position and show your commitment to resolving the situation, as done effectively in your letter.
Greeting & Closing
Your opening and closing are polite and appropriate, effectively setting the tone of the letter.
Task Completion
You clearly addressed all parts of the task, including apologizing, explaining what happened, and detailing how you plan to resolve the issue, demonstrating a strong understanding of the task requirements.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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