IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and other measures are needed. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In modern times, especially here in my country which is the Philippines a lot of
people
Use synonyms
 are using
cigarettes
Use synonyms
 to reduce their stress.
However
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 suggest that the government should mandate a law that does not allow smokers in public places.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 in society think that in order to encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to stop smoking there should be other precautions. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss how to reverse the perspective of smokers when it comes to using
cigarettes
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, smoking is a personal decision and most
people
Use synonyms
 here in my country do not abide by the law. So, I think providing a law does not guarantee
people
Use synonyms
 will stop what they are doing.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who used
cigarettes
Use synonyms
 for a long time will have a hard time stopping
this
Linking Words
 habit.
However
Linking Words
, if they will have the right information about the drawbacks of consistent usage of
cigarettes
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
, they may come to their senses of deciding to stop smoking on their own.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, perhaps the government may increase the tax on smoking products, which can give them a hard time purchasing if the price is above the price they can afford.
Thirdly
Linking Words
, the community can get involved in giving a hand to a person they know who is using
cigarettes
Use synonyms
 and give them pieces of advice and ways to get their attention.
Such
Linking Words
 as, giving them recreational activities, doing some exercise, and getting fit. In conclusion, several steps are needed to help a person who is struggling with smoking addiction. It should start with themselves.
Thus
Linking Words
, the government should make movements.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: