Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the *causes* of this? What are the *effects* of this on individuals and on the society?"
These days, it is common to see that more and more individuals are spending less
time
at home
. This
phenomenon may be explained by some reasons, and it obviously has several influences on each person as well as
society as a whole.
There are a bunch of causes why people
nowadays do not spend much time
at home
. To begin
with, people
are so busy with their hectic schedules. While
adults have to devote their time
and effort to work harder for higher income or promotion opportunities, children who are students have so many classes at school and attend a lot of extra classes. For example
, after 8 hours at the workplace, employees may need to meet their clients or participate in important conferences, whereas
kids usually go to English centres or study with their tutors at night after school. In addition
, when people
have spare time
, they are interested in hanging out and travelling with friends. This
also
means they do not stay at home
regularly.
From my perspective, this
tendency may have a lot of effects on individuals and society. First,
in terms of each individual, it is prone to be harmful to spend less time
staying at home
as they may lose the connection with family members. For instance
, parents and children may not share mealtime or watch TV together anymore, which are literally essential for a close-knit family, but frequently have lunch with colleagues or play with classmates. However
, this
trend may bring about some good impacts on our community due to
the fact that individuals need to spend more money when they go out, such
as to eat at a restaurant, buy a cup of coffee or stay at a hotel during their vacation. Apparently, this
could help a country's economy thrive considerably.
In conclusion, a lot of people
are giving
less and less Verb problem
spending
time
at home
. This
is due to
the fact that adults must work, children must study and their free time
is usually spent hanging out. Although
this
may be beneficial for the public, each person's relationship with their family may be adversely affected.Submitted by thanhthao.081096 on
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Task Response
Your essay addresses the given topic by discussing causes and effects of people spending less time at home. You have covered the main points effectively. Ensure to clearly address both causes and effects in separate paragraphs for better clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear overall structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, improve the introduction by providing a stronger thesis statement that clearly states the main points of the essay. Ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea to enhance coherence.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...