IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people claim that life in a big cities is dangerous for health. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #life #cities #health
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Nowadays the number of inhabitants from enormous
cities
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 declare that living there cause effective
problems
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 for
health
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.
However
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, I completely agree with
this
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 statement and will discuss
this
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 issue. On the one hand, supporters of living in big
cities
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 believe that the benefits from them cannot be ignored.
To begin
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 with, most of these
problems
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 have been caused by poverty and unemployment
people
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 in their town, they might take the wealth of other
people
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.
This
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 is to say, they have the ability to make danger for other inhabitants when they need money.
For instance
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, when facing the challenges of poor
people
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 in Life, these individuals might take more thieves in the city to overcome the difficulty of life.
Moreover
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, when they have less money, they can easily harm the
health
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 of others.
This
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 in turn has a negative impact on society and effect difficulty with respect of
health
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people
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 who live in enormous towns.
In addition
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, another argument against
such
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 plans is that the more
people
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 be poor, the more theft happened in big
cities
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. To put it difficult, e-
health
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 might severally attack for a variety of reasons. Take waste,
for example
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,
people
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 will feel more danger in
cities
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 because lots of reasons but the most important is related to governments and how they managed the towns'
problems
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 of
people
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. no one dares to deny the importance of managing a lot of life in big
cities
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 which is the responsibility of the city officials. In conclusion, obvious reasons every densely populated land cause many
problems
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 for
health
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problems
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such
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 as poverty and unemployment, I agree with
this
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 statement that
people
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 involved in many
problems
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 can hurt other
people
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.
Submitted by rasoolkhazaei995 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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