IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free timeDiscuss both views and state your opinion.

#money #time #timediscuss
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In today's challenging world, we come across the highest debated topic related to work and
money
Use synonyms
. Earning more with less leisure
time
Use synonyms
 is always better than earning less and enjoying more leisure
time
Use synonyms
. Well, both have their own pros and cons. In my view, earning less with more free
time
Use synonyms
 is more beneficial in most of the terms. I will discuss my views in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
Linking Words
, getting less income and enjoying more leisure
time
Use synonyms
 is always beneficial. We get to live only once. We have to make use of it to the highest. Running behind
money
Use synonyms
 can only bring in a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
health
Use synonyms
 issues.
Instead
Linking Words
, spending
time
Use synonyms
 with family, enjoying our life to the fullest, and enjoying vacations with family all these boosts our performance and
also
Linking Words
 keeps us healthy. Today,
health
Use synonyms
 is wealth. To maintain good
health
Use synonyms
 we have to have some of our
time
Use synonyms
 to spend wisely.
Secondly
Linking Words
, earning more
money
Use synonyms
 makes us greedy and we forget ourselves and dedicatedly work towards earning more and more
money
Use synonyms
, doing so, without our knowledge we keep losing our
health
Use synonyms
 track. If we are healthy we can earn more. Working more has attached a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
health
Use synonyms
 impacts
such
Linking Words
 as stress, back problems, bad
time
Use synonyms
 maintenance, working overtime, and whatnot.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, earning more
money
Use synonyms
 has a
lot
Use synonyms
 of benefits. It gives us a good lifestyle, travelling to international locations, quality education for our children etc.
However
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 brings in a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
health
Use synonyms
 risks associated with long-duration work, stress, frustration etc. Having free
time
Use synonyms
 makes us demotivated and isolates us. Saying
this
Linking Words
, I would conclude that it is always better to maintain a work-life balance which can happen by earning less which helps us spend ample
time
Use synonyms
 with our near and dear ones.
Submitted by sandhya7385 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Work-life balance
  • Quality of life
  • Economic independence
  • Leisure activities
  • Personal development
  • Stress management
  • Time management
  • Quality healthcare
  • Financial stress
  • Pursuing interests
  • Job satisfaction
  • Standard of living
  • Consumer goods
  • Savings and investments
What to do next:
Look at other essays: