In soem countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to slove them?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
People
Use synonyms
are becoming obese in a few nations and their well-being and aptitude are diminishing. In upcoming ,paragraphs I will talk about the causes and certain things they can do to fight
this
Linking Words
issue. To commence with, it gives rise to some heart diseases . To elaborate, obesity is the main reason for heart attacks , few folks are choosing to have an unhealthy lifestyle by eating junk food and unhealthy things which is the major reason for weight gain.
For instance
Linking Words
, even after knowing about the side effects of eating junk food
people
Use synonyms
are not giving up on it which is resulting in making them look fat .
Moreover
Linking Words
, because of their hectic,
schedule
Add a comma
,schedule
show examples
they cannot make time to exercise daily which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
affects their health and fitness . They feel tired after getting home. So, they don't feel like going to the gym or for a run . There are things they can do to combat
this
Linking Words
issue , like eating healthy . To explain it, they should always make their own lunch even if they are working because more folks eat from the outside whenever they are at work .
furthermore
Linking Words
, They should
also
Linking Words
decrease their workload so that they can find some leisure time for exercising daily . For epitome, a survey conducted in Canada showed that the primary reason for obesity is
people
Use synonyms
are stuck to their chairs whenever they are working their body is at rest most of the time . In conclusion,
instead
Linking Words
of working late everyone and eating unhealthy food
people
Use synonyms
should stick to a good workout routine and eat self-made dishes with fewer carbohydrates and calories .
Submitted by pankajrana12770 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: