the maps show Southside, a shopping mall, as it is now and plans for its development the maps show Southside, a shopping mall, as it is now and plans for its development
The two maps represent the shopping
mall
, Southside, in its current form and how it will look in the future.
Overall
, it can be clearly seen that green spaces such
as parks and golf courses will disappear for more stores
and for a bigger territory for car parks.
Nowadays, the Southside shopping centre
consists of only a supermarket, a department store, cinemas, a noodle shop and a café with a children’s play area and toilet facilities. Furthermore
, to the East of the Centre
there is a park and a golf course Add a comma
,Centre
while
to the south there is a fitness centre
and a car park. According to
the planned development of the mall
, only the supermarket, toilet and entrance will remain on
the same place and with the same Change preposition
in
size
. Thus
, it will be added a
new entrance in the department store will be twice bigger Correct article usage
the
than
at present. Change preposition
as
Moreover
, new fashion stores
, a gift shop, two shoe stores
, a cosmetics store and a beauty salon will be added to the future mall
. Subsequently
, for its size
it will be added Add a comma
,size
also
an info centre
that will help you to understand the placement of the stores
. Also
, the car park size
will be as big as the mall
size
. Finally
, the future mall
will be bigger, with a lot of new stores
and innovations, but a very bad feature is that the green area will be excluded and it is very bad for our environment.Submitted by alvianciubotaru on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words mall, stores, centre, size with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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