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Writing Samples
Band 6

In some countries, children have short school day of 5 hours. In other countries, the school duration is often longer. Does it have more benefits than drawbacks?

#countries #children #school #hours #duration
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Education ministry in many countries has introduced a new policy that restricts the
hours
Change to a genitive case
hour's
hours'
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students
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 can stay at their
school
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 up to five a day.
While
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 some argue that
this
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 policy has more disadvantages than advantages, I think that its benefits surpass the negative sides. Shortening the duration of being in a mandatory educational institution means that
students
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 will lose the
time
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 to study moderately.
This
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 will affect their career path after graduating. Any
university
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 in the world has been set the curriculum and requirements for graduation at the same level by the authorities.
This
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 means that
university
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students
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 need to sake more
time
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 catching up on the courses which are supposed to be done during high
school
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.
This
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 will make people doing their undergraduate more stressed.
On the other hand
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, restricting
students
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 from being at
school
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 for a long
time
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 would impact positively their well-being. Needless to say, Children undergo the most important stage to develop physically and mentally during their
school
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 periods. By increasing their
time
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 outside of
school
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, they could spend more
time
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 with their family and could do more activities, which have them exploring new interests, and improving their gratitude for their surroundings, resulting in open-minded people.
This
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 idea will
also
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 help to establish a durable personality for their
university
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 period. In conclusion, I believe that keeping kids in
school
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 for a shorter period of
time
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 has more advantages than disadvantages. As a negative aspect, it might boost the student’s burden during
university
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. But
this
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 policy will assist children to have enriched minds and durable mental which will be necessary for them after graduating from
school
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.
Submitted by akiyamam on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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