IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

It is thought by some that it is better to live in a city, while others believe that life is better in the countryside. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#city #life #countryside
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, there is a huge influx to big cities, as it is considered that the
life
 quality is of a higher level there, whilst some
people
 find
life
 closer to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature better.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will deliver my arguments on
this
 issue. First and foremost,
it is clear that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
there are more amenities in big cities making a resident’s
life
 easier. The presence of
big
Add an article
a big
show examples
 variety of shops and malls makes a desired product to be obtained simpler.
This
 matter makes
people
 admire
urban
Correct article usage
the urban
show examples
 lifestyle.
Additionally
, a vast majority of
people
 come to metropolises being appealed by the number of jobs being offered here. Another key point about the issue might be the supply of basic and vital resources demanded
for
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
human survival. It is not a secret that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cuts
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 electricity, water and gas supply for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
life
 may happen on
frequent
Add an article
a frequent
show examples
 basis in some areas.
This
 fact might raise numerous complaints about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
 in rural areas. Looking at the other side of the argument, it might be noticed that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
 in a town might not be as pleasant as it is mentioned above, as a big amount of industrial processes make big cities more contaminated places to live in. In
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
research, it was shown that the tendency to settle down in
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 increases among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 over 65. Those who decide, to move far from urban areas mostly are dissatisfied with
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
, as they seek a place with cleaner air to breath and with a more
quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
 environment to be surrounded by.
To conclude
, I think that every person needs to decide where to live based on
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 needs and desires they have. I think that a town with
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 medium vicinity of
people
 is more suitable for youngsters who aim at building a career,
whereas
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
whenever the age goes up
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 seems to be more congenial.
Submitted by equipepao on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • metropolitan
  • infrastructure
  • cosmopolitan
  • commute
  • sociocultural
  • prosperity
  • sustainability
  • rural
  • tranquility
  • urbanization
  • relocation
  • residential
  • populace
  • ecological footprint
What to do next:
Look at other essays: