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Writing Samples
Band 7

Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree?

#prison #countries #crime #people #education
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Imprisonment is the most common way to handle criminal individuals in most countries.
While
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 incarcerating people to punish crime helps set an example and keeps the world safer for the majority, it is actually not a real solution to the crime problem. A better way would be to eliminate the reasons that cause criminal activities. It is known that the likelihood of committing an offence decreases with the level of
education
Use synonyms
.
For example
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, data shows that high school dropouts are 3.5 times more likely to be arrested which is clearly visible in the United States, where about 40% of prisoners had not graduated from high school. Another example is in Canada, it is found that only 34% of inmates had completed high school. A similar indicator that backs up
this
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 is that the %85 per cent of juvenile criminals are low-literate. Statistics clearly show that there is a correlation between the level of
education
Use synonyms
 and incarceration.
Instead
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 of confining themselves to punishing wrongdoings, communities and governments should act proactively and focus on preventing them by solving the major issues that cause criminal behaviour. Better
education
Use synonyms
 not only teaches individuals to solve their problems without violence it
also
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 increases job opportunities which is another root cause of the crimes; poverty.
Lastly
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, it is
also
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 worth noting that sometimes illegal acts cannot be prevented with better
education
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. Like the crimes committed because of mental issues or under the influence of drugs. For
this
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 and similar kinds of crimes, prisons will always be necessary. But even in those cases, prisons can act as a place of
education
Use synonyms
 to rehabilitate people to help them reintegrate into society and give them options when they are released.
Submitted by es.altintas on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • tackles root causes
  • preventative approach
  • critical thinking
  • decision-making skills
  • recidivism rates
  • equipping
  • socio-economic benefits
  • underlying factors
  • poverty
  • ignorance
  • lack of opportunities
  • rehabilitation
  • ineffective
  • higher rates of re-offending
What to do next:
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