Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

Music

is considered an acceptable way to attract

people

from various cultures and different

ages

. I almost disagree with

this

statement. In the paragraphs to come

this

essay will put forth my perspective on

this

topic. There are two reasons why

music

cannot bring different cultures or

ages

together. At

first,

some

music

genres are too specific to an area and just can convey messages to local

people

This

is because, in these specific categories,

such

as folklore

music

, musical instruments and languages are too limited and domestic.

As a result

, other

people

from different cultures cannot understand and receive their meaning of them.

In addition

people

of different group

ages

have dissimilar

music

tastes.

Consequently

, they are not keen on listening to the same

music

For instance

, an adolescent may prefer to listen to rock or R&B

music

, maybe

as a result

of peer pressure, but his grandfather prefers to listen to traditional

Change preposition

apply

show examples

music

Hence

, both localization in specific

music

genres and the generation gap are crucial for the disability of

music

to bring

people

together.

However

, there is one reason that

music

can be beneficial in bringing

people

together.

Music

can transfer massages without any barrier .

This

is because of its international language in notes and musical features.

In other words

, musicians from all around the world and of any

ages

Fix the agreement mistake

age

show examples

are able to play a

music

piece with a note sheet and

this

is not related to their nationality or any other demographic information.

For instance

, should a Persian violinist decide to participate in recording a song in Italy, she may not face much trouble understanding the

music

Thus

music

can bring

people

from different nations closer and beneficial in their communications. In conclusion,

although

music

can play a crucial role in connecting

people

around the world because of its unlimited nature, I believe that the reasons that prevent

this

connection,

Correct your spelling

outweigh

it outweigh

itoutweigh

Correct pronoun usage

ititoutweigh

show examples

Submitted by miladahmadi9619 on Fri Mar 10 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that governments should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that better roads should be built. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is believed that individuals who engage in reading books can cultivate greater imagination and linguistic abilities than those who prefer television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Discuss the disadvantages of eating fast food on health. Why do people eat fast food? What can be done to discourage it?

Some people say that it is individual responsibility to protect the environment while others say it is the government's primary role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.