IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some believe that pupils should be given less homework, others say the opposite. What is your opinion?

#believe #pupils #homework
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It is argued that teachers in
school
Use synonyms
 should give less homework to students. In my opinion, the education system must include home
assignment
Fix the agreement mistake
assignments
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
, nowadays
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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school
Add a comma
,school
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 there are provided many subjects and many more extra exercises that significantly influence pupils' prosperity. In many countries, students are expected to study after
school
Use synonyms
 in order to keep up with their classes. They are
also
Linking Words
 given advanced assignments to develop their skills in Maths,
Literatures
Fix the agreement mistake
Literature
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 or Foreign Languages. Because of the
school
Use synonyms
's workload, these students may not have
time
Use synonyms
 to join
after
Add a hyphen
after-school
show examples
school
Use synonyms
 activities
such
Linking Words
 as playing sports, music or performing arts.
This
Linking Words
 way of teaching may result in a high number of stress and a lack of social ability. Young people spend the main part of their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 doing homework which deprives them to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
free fun
time
Use synonyms
. It stifles them.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many mental problems are triggered by permanent fatigue,
such
Linking Words
 as burnout or depression.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, to achieve perfection in any area practice is a must.
Therefore
Linking Words
, doing homework after
lecture
Correct article usage
a lecture
show examples
 enables one to develop skills and contribute to better learning.
Instead
Linking Words
 of draining hours watching television or scrolling the website, spending
time
Use synonyms
 on constructive work is advised. In conclusion, I would like to say that home assignment is a crucial part of learning materials, but the consequences of a huge amount of tasks have a detrimental impact towards pupils' health and prosperity.
It should
Correct pronoun usage
Should
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 be considered
to find
Change the verb form
finding
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 a way how to provide young people with qualitative knowledge without harm as a top priority.
Submitted by a_s_bykov on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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