Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this case? Do you think this is positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

It is believed that every day

children

spend time on their technology dives. In my point of view, I think the negative of taking risks outweigh the positive development. On the one hand,

smartphones

help

children

's lives be more convenient and flexible. In education, when

children

have a difficult task or want to learn some new knowledge, they can search the information on the internet by phone.

Hence

, students could self-learning and improve their study skills. In society,

children

can communicate with their friend and their family easily by texting and calling on

smartphones

. Especially for

children

who are studying aboard, it can still connect with their family from a far distance.

On the other hand

, individual technology dives have a negative influence on

children

's lives too.

First,

children

are unfocused in their studies when spending too much time on

smartphones

. In fact,

children

use

smartphones

as a tool to entertain

Change preposition

apply

show examples

suffering

Wrong verb form

suffer

show examples

social, texting with friends, and

watching

Wrong verb form

watch

show examples

videos,...

Therefore

, most of the time will spend on entertainment, not on education.

Second,

smartphones

will limit the ability of today's generation to communicate. Nowadays,

children

are too dependent on technology dives

instead

of going outside to communicate.

For example

, in Viet Nam

children

got used to video calling or chatting on social media which will make them become more unconfident than talking face to face. In conclusion, we can not deny the positive development that

smartphones

bring to

children

's lives.

However

, the effect of using

smartphones

will harm

children

when they use them incorrectly.

Submitted by nttung.182 on Mon Mar 13 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this case? Do you think this is positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Fully explain your ideas

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