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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some
people
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 assert that building more sports facilities is the best solution in order to improve
people
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's
health
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 condition. Is there any merit to
this
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 belief? There are two reasons to refute
this
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 idea:
firstly
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, governments should change
people
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's diet habits and
secondly
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,
people
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 should realize how
health
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 issues influence their lives.
To begin
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 with, we must recognize that many
people
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 have bad eating habits.
This
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 can include eating junk food
such
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 as hamburgers, French fries or instant noodles. By way of an example, university students tend to have unhealthy meals constantly.
According to
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 an article in the Asahi Shimbun newspaper, eight out of ten Japanese college students answered that they purchased fast food more than twice a week. If
this
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 trend continues, they might have chronic diseases
such
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 as obesity and diabetes.
As a result
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, the Ministry of
Health
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 in Japan is considering imposing an additional tax on the above-mentioned foods to avoid
health
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 issues.
As well as
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this
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,
people
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 need to understand how
health
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 problems impact them adversely before governments provide them with an opportunity to exercise. In fact, recent research conducted by The University of Tokyo discovered that many
people
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 are unlikely to consider
health
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 condition serious if they do not comprehend how crucial it is for their lives. They often realize it after suffering some
health
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 problems
such
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 as liver or lung cancers.
This
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 behaviour,
therefore
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 indicates that governments take urgent action to understand their nation
how
Correct word choice
and how
show examples
health
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 care is vital. In conclusion, there are more advantages to stopping
people
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 from bad eating habits and letting them figure out the importance of
health
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 care
instead
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 of providing sports facilities. Government must consider these facts and address
health
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 issues urgently.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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