Young people spend too much time and money following fashion trends (clothing, technology). To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

#people #time #money #fashion #trends #technology

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Nowadays, young

people

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spend most of their time and money following trends in fashion in terms of clothing and

technology

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. I disagree with

this

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statement because I think

this

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phenomenon will bring several benefits to the youth.

Firstly

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, following the trend mode might increase the young community's self-esteem. When they wear new clothing or smartphone, they will get a feeling of satisfaction because of positive words or appreciation from other

people

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in their surroundings.

Furthermore

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, it becomes part of rewarding themselves when they get high achievements.

For example

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, after her friends say that she is charming in her clothes, it will increase her confidence and mood.

As a result

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, having new stuff might bring happiness to young society.

Secondly

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due to

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following fashion trends in terms of

technology

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, young

people

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can build their capacity in academic ways.

Technology

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such

Linking Words

as smartphones provides much reliable information from many parts of the world that young

people

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can use to underpin their studies.

While

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the youth want to search for new data on the internet, they can use many trustworthy applications

such

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as Google to find out the answer.

For instance

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, a student who has an assignment from his teacher can search for the answer on the internet rather than in a book.

Therefore

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, spending much time following trends will increase their academic ability regarding improving their knowledge.

To sum up

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, by following the newest fashion trend

such

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as clothing and

technology

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, young

people

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can have more self-satisfaction and support their education processes in school or university.

Submitted by rahmad.iriyandi on Wed Mar 15 2023

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Young people spend too much time and money following fashion trends (clothing, technology). To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some colleges encourage students to create businesses while they are still in school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the coutryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development.

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important.

Directors and managers of organization are often older people. Some people say that it is better for younger people to be leaders. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people regard the increasing business and cultural contact between countries as a positive development. Others, however, feel that this will lead to the loss of national identities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.