The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The given diagram describes the whole process of creating

sugar

Use synonyms

from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

Overall

Linking Words

, we can see that there are seven stages of production, starting from growing the

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

to the final product.

To begin

Linking Words

with,

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

takes about

one

Use synonyms

one

Use synonyms

and a half years to grow. When they are fully grown, there are two ways in which

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

is harvested. The first

one

Use synonyms

involves a specifically designed machine that collects these canes, and the second

one

Use synonyms

is done by hand - each

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

is cut with a blade slightly above the ground. After that,

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

Use synonyms

is crushed and transformed into juice. The juice is,

then

Linking Words

, purified using a limestone filter. By applying heat to the filtered juice within an evaporator, the liquid is removed and transformed into syrup.

This

Linking Words

syrup is

then

Linking Words

put into a centrifuge, which can separate the

sugar

Use synonyms

crystals from the syrup itself.

Finally

Linking Words

, the

sugar

Use synonyms

is dried and cooled in a special container.

Submitted by praewsu2513 on Wed Mar 15 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, cane, one with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

164 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The best way to solve the word’s environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

In some time countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Since it is so easy to reach a large audience on the internet, people have to be exceptionally talented to become famous these days. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes ( for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). ?to what extent do you agree or disagree?