Young people who commit serious crimes, such as robbery or violent attacks should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #crimes #robbery #attacks #adults

It is sometimes believed that young people who commit serious crimes should be punished equally as adults.

This

essay strongly disagrees with

this

suggestion as now will be discussed. The first argument behind my belief is that young criminals are mostly found to have poor school attendance, which is solely the fault of their parents. The failure to attend school as a daily routine instils in children that they do not have to comply with social norms and that they can do as they please.

For example

, if they had proficient care from their parents or other family members, they could establish good habits and have strong discerning power to stay away from doing bad things.

Hence

, it would be unfair to sentence young crimes as same as adults

due to

the difference in the level of social awareness. Another point worth mentioning is that young incarceration may have complex threats to the emotional and physical well-being of children. Incarcerated juveniles who are in their main physical development stage often have unmet health needs when being in jail and may face subsequent worse health status than their non-justice-involved counterparts.

Also

, ex-offenders are more likely to face suspicion and prejudice after release which may erode depressive symptoms.

For instance

, it would be extremely challenging for released prisoners to apply for a decent job or to rent a house. The consequent economic hardship can perpetuate the vicious cycle of recidivism. In

this

manner, harsh retribution is not suitable for juvenile crimes for its disastrous consequences. In conclusion, I entirely disagree that young people should be punished as same as an adult given the aforementioned arguments.

Submitted by hoanmy2101 on Wed Mar 15 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts, while boys like science. what are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?
Education is a fundamental right of every individual and should not be prevented by the difference in gender. However, it has been common for girls in schools prefer to take art classes whereas boys tend to select science for a long period of time. I will examine some background behind this tendency and provide reasons to believe this should be changed to adapt to various demands in the modern world.
<4
band
Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic.
It is crystal clear that nowdays people have problem with their weight and this issue causes a lot of problem.I am inclined to the opinion that it will cause a lot of problem which I will explain more in this essay .
6.5
band
In today’s very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed. Among the skills that a worker should possess, Which skill do you think is more important, social skills or good qualification? Explain the reasons and provide specific examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, the workforce market has become very competitive, forcing employees to obtain more skill sets but some people believe that no matter the skill, having a good educational background is more important. I agree that good qualification is important to become successful.
4
band
Advertising that targets children should be banned from our televisions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that ads that target younger should be restricted on tv. This essay totally agrees with this statement because children become demanding and if their wishes are not fulfilled, they become stubborn.
5
band
Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often thought that government's investment on the arts is a waste, therefore such funds earmarked for it should be utilized in other areas such as building roads and hospitals. I completely disagree because the arts is not only an aspect of people's lives that they derive pleasure and entertainment from but it is also a potential source of huge revenue for government.

Young people who commit serious crimes, such as robbery or violent attacks should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts, while boys like science. what are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?

Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic.

In today’s very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed. Among the skills that a worker should possess, Which skill do you think is more important, social skills or good qualification? Explain the reasons and provide specific examples to support your answer.

Advertising that targets children should be banned from our televisions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?