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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Several languages are in danger of extinct because these are spoken by small number of people. Some people say that government should spend public for money on saving these languages by other believe that it would be waste of money discuss both opinion.

#languages #danger #people #government #money #waste
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Language works as a window to different beautiful cultures and heritage. There is a heated argument over the efforts of the administration to invest finances to save the vernacular from vanishing
while
 others think that it is a preponderant step towards various modes of communication. In
this
 essay, I will elaborate on both views and give my own opinion on
this
 matter.
To begin
 with, spending money to preserve any specific endangered language is a worthy process.
Firstly
, certain cultures are embedded within different dialects as the way of speaking is an integral part of cultural identity.
moreover
, not giving the desired value to protect the mother tongue, may lead to a loss of unique customs, traditions, and histories that connect the young generation with their ancestors.
secondly
, various hidden knowledge of local ecosystems and traditional medicine would be discovered only if a person has a group over their mood of communication. To illustrate, native languages used by the tribal people of
Amazon
Correct article usage
the Amazon
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 have a specific word for different medicinal plants with unique healing properties.
Thus
, their loss may impact modern medicines or environmental conservation. On the flip side, allocating funds to
this
 project is believed to be the wrong season.
Due to
 the allocation of resources, public funds would be better spent on issues like healthcare, education, and infrastructure that need a significant amount of capital for improvements. As
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 there is the majority of mankind lives below the poverty line and
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
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 free or cost of efficient medical facilities.
Additionally
, every Vernacular follows the natural process of evolution. with the globalization of societies, the
extinctionof
Correct your spelling
extinction of
 a few oral speeches
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 normal
that
Correct word choice
and
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 is not used by the new offspring.
Consequently
, it is unrealistic to protect every native that dies out naturally.
Overall
, language transfers vast information from one age group to another, and
for
this
 reason, I believe that required sports should be given to conserve diverse languages that are near to
vanish
Wrong verb form
vanishing
show examples
 without compromising essential services. Even more, it is the duty of resign to ensure equal accessibility of both the prospects among the future wave.
Submitted by sarabjeetk8899 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a complete response to the task by addressing both sides of the argument, but could benefit from more clarity and focus.
task achievement
Ensure that your ideas are clearly and comprehensively expressed. Some points lack clarity and depth.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains good coherence and cohesion, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the logical structure can be improved. Some paragraphs could have smoother transitions.
coherence cohesion
Your essay begins with a strong introduction that sets the scene for the discussion of both sides of the argument.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples, particularly the example of the medicinal plants in the Amazon, to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your argument and emphasizes the importance of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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