IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Crime rates will fall as advances in technology make it easier to detect and prevent crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#crime #rates #fall #advances #technology #crimes
In
these
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
recent years, the community raised concerns about the
crime
 rate in suburban areas. Some people advocate the need for
technology
 in the area.
Hence
, it might bring a negative trend to
crime
 and the residents will feel more secure in the area. from my personal view, I totally agree that the innovations of digital devices do bring benefits to
society
, especially
crime
. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the subjects by demonstrating examples and my standpoint.
To begin
, the rate of
crime
 in the nation has highly impacted public lifestyles. The claim
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
technology
 will demerit lawlessness activities .
For example
, surveillance cameras, detection sensors and others.
Consequently
, the unlawful
personal
Replace the word
personnel
show examples
 will be more hesitant to
do steals
Wrong verb form
steal
show examples
 or
robs
Correct subject-verb agreement
rob
show examples
due to
 the
technology
 in place. These can bring benefits to our
society
.
On the other hand
,
In
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Japan and, China
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 fully committed to the latest automation in their surveillance and can randomly recognise people by using cameras.
For instance
, if a person steals a wallet at a cultural event. The rate of resolving the case with
technology
 is up to 80%.
Likewise
, cameras can detect the person's footage and be able to track the person down instantly, these are the reasons that
technology
 could be a great support for combating unlawful activities.
To sum up
, advanced digital devices do bring ample convenience and benefits to
society
. We just need to be smart in using them and navigate the full functions of the devices. I reiterate that modern technologies do bring advantages to
society
 especially unlawful activities.
Submitted by SugerMei on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a separate main point with clear topic sentences and supporting details. Use transition words to show the connection between ideas.
task response
Provide a more balanced view that considers counterarguments and different perspectives. Ensure that you fully address the prompt by discussing both the advantages and potential limitations of technology in crime prevention.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crime deterrent
  • high-tech surveillance
  • facial recognition systems
  • omnipresence
  • deter
  • digital forensics
  • ballistic testing
  • revolutionize
  • exonerate
  • root causes
  • social inequality
  • invasion of privacy
  • civil liberties
  • surveillance
  • data collection
  • negative implications
  • cybercrime
  • hacking
  • identity theft
  • online fraud
  • cybersecurity
  • vulnerabilities
  • exploit
What to do next:
Look at other essays: