There is more and more outrage and anger common in society today. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

this

contemporary era, rage and anger among humans rising globally

due to

which they have to face harmful consequences.

According to

my perspective, it is a negative development and we will discuss the reasons in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence, individuals tend to get aggressive when they are unemployed. To elaborate, there are no jobs in the market

due to

which people are not able to fulfil their family’s needs which makes them angry and everybody around them suffers.

Furthermore

, political issues

also

instil hate among members of different religions as political leaders provoke the public

as a result

riots tend to happen.

For example

, many political parties in India, are against Islam and they tend to incite other religions against them which creates hostility towards each other.

Thus

, the above example vividly illustrates why outrage is common in today’s society. To continue, another factor that triggers individuals is their psychological well-being. To elucidate, individuals often fight a battle among themselves

as a result

they often experience negative emotions and they react aggressively. To exemplify, a child who had a traumatic childhood whose parents have an abusive relationship would become a violent person as he/she has seen

this

kind of behaviour in the past which would normalise violence in the child’s mind

Moreover

, people might fall prey to false news or rumours which can impact them negatively and they way follow the path of violence to deal with

such

issues.

Hence

, the aforementioned reason substantiates why anger is increasing these days. To recapitulate, people are not able to be employed as there are no jobs in the market which

gets

Verb problem

makes it

show examples

difficult for them to earn a livelihood resulting in outrage.

In addition

, mental health issues often make them disturbed

as a result

they showcase aggression.

Submitted by sanchidhupar96 on Wed Mar 22 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be clearer and more focused on the topic. Make sure to directly answer the question in the introduction and summarize the main points in the conclusion.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses the question but lacks a clear and comprehensive exploration of the topic. Ensure that all arguments are relevant and sufficiently supported with examples. Use more specific examples and elaborate on each point to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Outrage culture
Amplification
Economic hardship
Sensationalist
Polarization
Constructive outcomes
Social frustration
Divisiveness
Societal norms
Historical context

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There is more and more outrage and anger common in society today. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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