it is important for people to take risks, both in their personal and professional life. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages

#people #risks #life

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Some people believe that taking

risks

Use synonyms

, both in terms of one’s private life and one’s working career, is advantageous

overall

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. I totally agree with

this

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idea,

although

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risky behaviour can sometimes lead to unpleasant

consequense

Correct your spelling

consequences

consequence

, I firmly believe that the advantages of taking

risks

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outweigh the drawback. On the one hand, taking

risks

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can lead to negative physical injury and financial loss. In jobs related to sports

such

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as running, skydiving,

racing

Correct word choice

and racing

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. Those jobs all carry certain

risks

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and if you are passionate about those risky jobs, you will force to

faced

Wrong verb form

face

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with

Change preposition

apply

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the risk of

life-threating

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life-threatening

injuries and even death.

However

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then

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you will get to enjoy the adventure. In business,

high-risk

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the high-risk

a high-risk

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investment

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investments

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may either offer the chance of significant returns or devastating losses. In the latter case, the companies may lose

substantial

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a substantial

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amount

Fix the agreement mistake

amounts

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of money and even face

backruptcy

Correct your spelling

bankruptcy

On the other hand

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, taking

Add an article

a risk

the risk

show examples

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

personal lives

a personal life

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personal

Replace the word

person

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lives can generate more

oppotunities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

. When you are able to accept

risks

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you will have access to more types of work, so it is easier for you to step out of your comfort zone and discover yourself in a new light.

In other words

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, when you dare to take

risks

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, you will improve yourself, develop your thinking, and move faster to success.

This

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envidenced

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evidenced

in the case of Bill Gates who dropped out of Havard University, but later become the richest man in the world. Bill Gates is a prime example

for

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show examples

people who tend to take

risks

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can

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and can

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achieve great results. In conclusion,the benefits of taking

risks

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at work and in personal life are greater than the disadvantages. For work, you can earn a large amount of money from risky investments and for individuals, you will have new opportunities to discover yourself. and I think with those benefits, we should take the risk because maybe there's a good outcome after that.

Submitted by thuthu.anhbui on Sat Mar 25 2023

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Some people think that team sports prepare children for work life but others think individual sports are better. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.