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Writing Samples
Band 6

The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life. Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

#idea #career #fashion #careers #money #education #life #support #arguments #evidence
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Career plays a vital role in our lives.
While
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 some
people
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 believe that
people
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 should have a single career, which is becoming old-fashioned by the way, others believe that every one of us must have multiple
careers
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for earning
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to earn
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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money and that learning will continue to be part of our lives forever.
This
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 essay will argue on both sides with relevant examples for a deeper understanding. On the one hand,
people
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 who have a single
profession
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 are considered old-fashioned because they never try to learn the new booming technologies, markets, and trends that will help them acquire more wealth.
Consequently
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, they tend to face a lot of financial issues.
For example
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, one of my friends, who started his career as a school teacher in 2010, continues to do the same work with more and more enthusiasm.
However
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, the money that he earned through his single
profession
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 was not quite enough to run a happy family.
Thus
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, sticking to a single
profession
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 has been considered old-fashioned.
On the other hand
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, most
people
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 tend to acquire many jobs
due to
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 the abundance of opportunities available in the market. The more they gain knowledge, the higher their chances are of getting multiple
careers
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.
Hence
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, learning is a significant part of our lives and helps us pursue the
profession
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 we desire.
For instance
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, my family friend, who is working as an IT professional, started his own start-up garment business. The money earned through two different sources is considered a huge amount to maintain a successful and happy life. To summarise,
This
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 essay has argued about the viewpoint of having a single
profession
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 ,
on the contrary
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 how it helps us if we have several
careers
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. In my opinion,
people
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 who are capable of handling multiple
careers
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 at the same time should be given enough opportunities to contribute to the economy of the country.
Submitted by kani.reethu on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the logical structure of ideas could be improved for better coherence.
task achievement
The response is complete with a clear presentation of comprehensive ideas. However, providing more specific and relevant examples would enhance the overall response.
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