In many countries, people increasingly talk about money such as how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations. Why? Is this a positive or negative trend?

#countries #people #money #conversations #trend

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It is certainly true that

money

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is a well-discussed subject throughout the world, Individuals talk about it on a daily basis. In

this

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essay, I will discuss why, and I will provide evidence as to why

this

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is a negative trend. One of the many reasons is that today we live in a world where

money

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is essential, everything we see costs

money

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for example

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, if someone wants to buy a property, go on vacation, or even send his kids to university, he has to pay an amount of cash in order to achieve that.

Moreover

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, nowadays in our society, it determines your status, so if you have got a big sum of

money

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people

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will respect you and you can easily make friends,

in contrast

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, individuals don't have much respect for poor

people

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and

also

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, it's hard for them to make new friends, as being said,

money

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is so important so that's why

people

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talk so much about it. In my opinion,

this

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is a negative trend, if human beings are measured by the sum of cash they own,

this

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will have bad consequences on our community because based on

this

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principle, citizens will no longer care about good manners and will become purely materialistic.

Furthermore

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, relationships and friendships will not have the same value amongst individuals as they used to, so

instead

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of asking about one's health or family, they only get interested in his career and ask about the things he purchased or his salary, and

as a result

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people

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will feel isolated and get the sense that they have no real friends.

To conclude

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, as I have discussed in

this

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essay,

people

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talk about

money

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for a variety of reasons, and in my point of view,

this

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is a very bad trend.

Submitted by saberyouc on Sun Mar 26 2023

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- Task Response: The essay partially addresses the prompt, discussing the reasons behind the increasing discussions about money. However, the task required a balanced discussion of both positive and negative aspects, which is lacking in the essay. It is important to ensure a thorough response to the prompt by considering all aspects of the given topic. - Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure is mostly clear, with a well-organized introduction and conclusion. However, the essay lacks in supporting the main points effectively. There is a need for clearer connections between ideas and more coherent progression throughout the essay. Ensure that supporting details are provided to strengthen the main points made in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
materialism
financial transparency
societal taboos
economic fluctuations
financial management
financial literacy
purchasing decisions
wealth glorification
economic stratification
social comparison
peer pressure
income disparity

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In many countries, people increasingly talk about money such as how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations. Why? Is this a positive or negative trend?

Fully explain your ideas

The following is an essay submitted by one of our students. In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Few young people are leaving their homes from rural areas to study and work in cities. What are the reason? do advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, there has beeenan increase in the number of parents who are choosin to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?