IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Online shopping is replacing the shopping in stores. Do you think it is positive or negative?

#stores
Undoubtedly, shopping is liked by every age group.In previous periods, individuals went to local shops to buy items. With the advancement of technology,
people
 tend to move towards online shopping
instead
 of in-person shopping. I think that online shopping has positive effects on
people
 and the economy. I will elaborate on my viewpoints regarding the given notion with suitable examples and a conclusion in subsequent paragraphs.  To strengthen my point of view,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online shopping brings more benefits to the masses.
Firstly
, the public can save precious time as they do not need to stand in lines for their waiting
as well as
, and folks do not need to go to the local crowded markets because they can order everything online from distinct websites
as a result
,
people
 can finish their other tasks
while
 waiting for their shipments.
Secondly
, individuals can get a lot of great deals on special occasions
whereas
, local shops do not offer
such
 schemes dint of
this
,
people
 can save their capital and they can get more stuff at fewer prices
as well as
, sometimes the community can get free shipping on their orders
therefore
, it is
also
 a reason for the masses to choose the online shopping services.
For instance
, some online
retailers
 provide coupons to their
customers
 if they shop for more than a hundred dollars but local stores do not offer these kinds of services so
customers
 decide to do shopping  online.
Furthermore
, online
retailers
also
 help to boost the economic conditions of their countries because when
people
 buy their goods from the sites
then
, some websites deduct taxes from consumers
consequently
, taxes are paid to the government directly or indirectly.
Moreover
, online shopping is a golden opportunity for both merchants and consumers as
customers
 can get any product from other countries just sitting at their homes and
retailers
 can
also
 earn a great amount of money from their
customers
. To recapitulate, I believe that online shopping is a positive development for
customers
 and
retailers
 because it provides more benefits to them and because of the technology, many
people
 can earn money by promoting their products.
Submitted by sekhogghk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: