IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a childs development while others think it is important to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your opinion

#people #children #home #childs #development #school #methods
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
One
Use synonyms
 of the social concerns today relates to
Correct article usage
the that
show examples
that teaching
Change the determiner
that teaching child
those teaching children
show examples
children
Use synonyms
 at home is best for a
childs
Change to a genitive case
child's
show examples
 development
while
Linking Words
 others think it is important to go to
school
Use synonyms
 .
While
Linking Words
 it is widely believed that teaching at home is best for
Add an article
a childs
show examples
childs
Change to a genitive case
child's
show examples
 development, others believe teaching
children
Use synonyms
 at
school
Use synonyms
 is very important. In my opinion,
reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have the following advantages and disadvantages. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, it is argued
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some that
children
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
development
Replace the word
developed
show examples
 when they are educated
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
 homeschooling helps parents and
children
Use synonyms
 understand each other better about each other’s personalities and
throughts
Correct your spelling
thoughts
,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 students often feel lonely.
Linking Words
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
 parents choose what their
children
Use synonyms
 learn.
For example
Linking Words
, parents can teach their
children
Use synonyms
one
Use synonyms
 on
one
Use synonyms
,
Correct word choice
and thay
show examples
thay
Correct your spelling
they
 often understand the curriculum better and more quickly, too.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is strongly believed by others that spending
children
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
school
Use synonyms
 is the best. People often have
this
Linking Words
 opinion because students sometimes can play
school
Use synonyms
 sports or participate in other activities and programs available to people in a
school
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, homeschooling or
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to
school
Use synonyms
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are all educational methods. Personally, I tend to believe that depending on the position of each family and the wishes of the child, we will choose the most appropriate educational method.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: