IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that countryside life is healthier while others believe that city is better in order to have a healthy lifestyle. Discuss both views with your own perception.

#people #countryside #life #city #lifestyle #perception
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While
 it is widely believed that
countryside
life
 is healthier, others believe that the
city
 is better in order to have a healthy lifestyle. In my opinion, we must
toknow
Correct your spelling
to know
 protect our bodies. On the one hand, it is argued by some that
countryside
life
 is healthier than the
city
.
Firstly
countryside
life
 is quiet not noisy and chaotic because when
people
livein
Correct your spelling
live in
a place quietly, they feel the
body
 is relaxed,
brain
Add an article
the brain
show examples
 doesn’t think much.
For
example
, my mother likes to live in the
countryside
 because in the
city
 she thinks about work very much.
Secondly
, the
air
 is good and little smoke from vehicle help
people
 have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strong health.
For
example
, the
air
city
 is very polluted if
people
 inhale, their
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
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 will have very sick. The
air
countryside
 isn’t more polluted than the
air
city
 so
people
 will have little sick.
On the other hand
, it is strongly believed by others that facility is modern, very place entertainment, hospital, gym,… so
countryside
life
 isn’t healthier than in the
city
.
People
 often have
this
 opinion because
people
 who have strong health
then
 must have the full facilities from medical to service.
For
example
, when
people
 have sick
then
 they will bring to a hospital near fastly. A second point is that
this
 has very healthy food and drink for the
body
 of
people
.
For
example
, food and drink have nutrients that will help the
body
 of
people
 to be very strong, and limit very sick. In conclusion,
countryside
life
 is healthier
while
others
Change preposition
in others
show examples
, the
city
 is better in order to have a healthy lifestyle. Personally, I tend to believe that which
also
 very good
important
Correct word choice
and important
show examples
 must
toknow
Correct your spelling
to know
 protect our bodies.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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