More and more people want to buy clothes, cars, and other items with famous brands. What are the reasons? Is it a positive or negative development?

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In contemporary society, more and more people have a tendency to buy commodities from prestigious brands. The primary reason for
this
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propensity stems from the increasing popularity of commercials and the rising standard of living among the general population. I hold the belief that
this
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can have permanent negative effects on their finances and way of life. It is undeniable that we are inundated with many commercials in the mainstream media and on social media. These advertisements are sophisticatedly blended with sound effects and spectacular lights,
as well as
Linking Words
the inventive performances of numerous reputable actors.
Therefore
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, these commercials are effective at alluring thousands of consumers and shaping their idea that possessing famous goods is fashionable and deserving of respect.
Moreover
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, living conditions have dramatically increased in developed countries. When citizens in these countries have lucrative earnings and better financial means, they seek to acquire extravagant products to demonstrate their social standing.
This
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notion motivates people to devote a considerable amount of money to purchasing goods that are manufactured by prestigious enterprises. Despite the fact that
this
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propensity can provide people with both material and spiritual satisfaction, I am of the opinion that it can have detrimental impacts on both financial and moral standards. Regarding financial conditions, some individuals on a restricted budget spend all of their hard-earned money on luxury items
due to
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the belief that well-known brands frequently signify riches and success. Afterwards, they can become indebted and experience inadequate money. Another drawback is that it can lead to an increase in materialism. When a person overestimates the worth of a product from a prestigious company, they frequently undervalue the products that others
are possessing
Wrong verb form
possess
show examples
.
This
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may cause individuals to become overly materialistic and fixable solely on worldly possessions, as opposed to interpersonal connections or spiritual ideals. In conclusion, I believe that the tendency
of purchasing
Change preposition
to purchase
show examples
goods from reputable enterprises is increasing in popularity
due to
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the impact of advertising and inhabitants' increased incomes.
This
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may have a negative impact on personal finances and promote materialism.
Submitted by dangtranquoctrung01 on

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coherence cohesion
Excellent job in presenting and supporting your ideas. The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Make sure to maintain coherence and cohesion by using transitional phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.
task achievement
You have addressed the task effectively by discussing the reasons why people buy items from famous brands and whether it is a positive or negative development. Make sure to provide balanced arguments for both perspectives to enhance your task response.
task achievement
Great job in providing specific reasons and examples to support your arguments.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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