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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that children of all ages should have extra responsibilities. Others believe that, outside of school, children should be free to enjoy life. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the modern day, several individuals think that
children
Use synonyms
 of all ages should have additional responsibilities
while
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 others argue that, outside of
school
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, youngsters should be free to enjoy their life. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both notions and explain why I agree with the latter.
To begin
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 with, there are some reasons why
children
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 should take on extra responsibilities when they finish studying at
school
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 in a day.
Firstly
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,
children
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 should help with household chores. Not only
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 their parents who feel very tired after a long
time
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 working in a company or an office, but it
also
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 improves their household skills.
Furthermore
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, in a wealthy family, some parents have their own businesses, and their offspring can come to work during their leisure
time
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 to gain more experience
for instance
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.
In addition
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, it is
also
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 a way to prepare for their future to become inheritors of that company. It can be seen clearly that these can help the young to be more responsible and mature. Despite the above, I suppose that
children
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 should use their free
time
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 after
school
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 to explore their strengths. At
school
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, they are already restricted because they just only study something in a book or what their teacher says. So the
time
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 after
school
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 is the best
time
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 for them to have a chance to discover and reach their potential.
For instance
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, they can try different sports from football to badminton or learn new skills like dancing or skiing that are suited to their interests and capabilities. In conclusion,
although
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children
Use synonyms
 may gain some potential ability with added responsibilities, they will grow up better with more freedom outside the academic environment.

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coherence
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and connects logically to the others.
cohesion
Use linking words to improve flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Give more specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
You present both views clearly and express your own opinion.
coherence
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • responsibilities
  • life skills
  • time management
  • teamwork
  • problem-solving
  • accountability
  • work ethic
  • independence
  • consequences
  • creative development
  • social interactions
  • burnout
  • excessive
  • balance
What to do next:
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