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Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries people have to go away from their family and friends to find work. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #friends #work #outweigh
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Moving away from
friends
 and family in search of work has become common among many
people
.
While
this
 trend is not without its drawbacks, I would contend that it is, for the most part, advantageous.
Initially
, it is essential to consider some possible downsides of living apart from
friends
 and family because of work.The most concerning aspect is arguably social isolation.
This
 is because they might not have an opportunity to spend quality time,
such
 as talking, preparing meals, doing housework and generally being
together with
 their loved ones.
This
 is compounded by the fact that there can be a high level of stress.
Consequently
, it can be challenging to have
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 active social life outside of work without
friends
 and family nearby, which can affect
one
's general well-being. In these regards, working away from
friends
 and family can negatively affect
one
's ability to feel connected
maintain
Correct word choice
and maintain
show examples
 good health. Despite these drawbacks, I believe the benefits of being a migrant worker outweigh the negatives.
One
 of the most
obivious
Correct your spelling
obvious
 advantages is enjoying a more interesting life. Being an
alein
Correct your spelling
alien
 worker creates opportunities for travelling, meeting new
people
 and learning of new cultures, which generally makes a more dynamic lifestyle. On a more professional note, the movement of
people
 for job prospects makes them more versatile and resourceful. Working in different environments,
one
 can learn a range of skills and qualities
such
 as
people
 skills and
flexiblity
Correct your spelling
flexibility
. More importantly,
people
 can build a broad network of
friends
 from diverse backgrounds and walks of life. Possessing these qualities and having a wide social circle improves
one
's chance of succeeding in today's competitive world. In conclusion, though I admit leaving away from
friends
 and family in pursuit of
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
 is unfavourable in some respects, it is compensated by
adventurous
Correct article usage
an adventurous
show examples
 lifestyle, a variety of skills and a large number of connections.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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