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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

People in many countries are spending less time with their families. What are the reasons, and effects of this?

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Spending few
time
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 with family is remarkable among
individuals
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 in different countries. There are many reasons for
this
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 problem.
This
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 essay will discuss the main reasons and effects of
this
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 problem. First and foremost, working
people
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 do not want to interrupt their careers with external factors
such
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 as a family, a hobby, or a spare
time
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 activity. They believe that focusing on a career requires lots of sacrifice and determination.
In addition
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, women are spending their
time
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 becoming successful at work. They have to put much more effort into their jobs rather than men.
Moreover
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,
people
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 use their free
time
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 for their jobs
besides
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 their
families
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.
For instance
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, many successful
people
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 have complicated relationships with their
families
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. They don't have enough
time
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 to understand their needs and problems. Some of them decide to continue their marriage, but others already know the fact that they have to spend more
time
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 with their
families
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 ,
although
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 they do not have enough
time
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 for their
families
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. The second major factor is that society realizes they do not have to continue their strong family bonds. There are other alternatives which can assist in talking with other
people
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 easily on social media. It could be an alternative to a real family for them. Nowadays,
individuals
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 do not share their problems with their
families
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, and they prefer to share them with strangers.
Furthermore
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, If they don't want to continue their conversation they can ignore it.
This
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 opportunity makes family bonds weaker than they used to be. One of the crushing results is young
people
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 can experience sexual harassment
on
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apply
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online without knowing anything. In conclusion,
individuals
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 from different countries spend less
time
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 with their
families
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, focus on their own careers or spend their extra
time
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 on social media. These reasons affect the family bonds of
individuals
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 over
time
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.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demands of the workplace
  • digital technology
  • social media
  • individualism
  • erosion of family bonds
  • emotional distance
  • strain relationships
  • emotional support
  • negative impact
  • emotional, social, and academic challenges
  • neglected
  • guidance and support
  • stress and mental health issues
  • anxiety
  • depression
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