the diagram shows blow the changes that have taken place at west park secondary school since its construction in 1950

#blow #changes #place #west #park #school #construction

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the picture shows the changes at west park secondary university, establish in 1950 till 2010

overall

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

the main road remains in the same place for over 60 years of time. the faculty had undergone some significant changes with

Correct article usage

the increase

show examples

increase

Change the verb form

increasing

show examples

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

space of the school building. the parking space is

also

Linking Words

enlarged, and the sports field and playground are cut down to half. as can be seen from the diagram, the first time different renovations were made to the institute ground was in 1980. in 1950 there were houses and farmland, and in comparison to 1980 the car park and the science block were constructed in the place of houses and a farmland space is just converted into sportsfield.

furthermore

Linking Words

, in 2010, the science block and the school's main building remains the same. over the period of 30 ,years the car park is extended. the playground area is cut down to half and the other half of the playground became

sports

Correct article usage

a sports

show examples

field. in

brief

Add a comma

,brief

show examples

the area around the institution building made several changes over the past 60 years.

Submitted by abhikshatriya14 on Fri Apr 14 2023

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.

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Basic structure: Change the seventh paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "remains" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the eighth paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

9 paragraphs

181 words

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the diagram shows blow the changes that have taken place at west park secondary school since its construction in 1950

In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Financial education should be included as a mandatory subject in schoolto prepare students for managing money effectively. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large, extended family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend?