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Band 4.5

Some people say that arts subject such as painting, or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #arts #school #students
Many individuals argued that subjects which are related to
art
 have not
be
Change the verb form
been
show examples
 compulsory for pupils who study at high school. Faithfully, I do have
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
Add the particle
to
show examples
answer
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 issue. So,
this
 essay will
further
 explore
this
 thought-provoking question. On the one hand,
art
 is a specific subject which requires good creativity and imagination.
However
, if you start to draw or paint in the future you will enhance your imagination and creativity.
Also
, when you make
art
 it contributes to another part of the brain and gives you the ability to use your brain one hundred
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Hence
, you can start to solve some issues easier and faster.
Furthermore
, it improves your intelligence and makes you more knowledgeable. I mean that
instead
 of how to paint you are
also
 thought the history of certain paints or
art
 in general.
In addition
,
this
 is very good when you can draw well. On other hand, not everyone admires
art
 at all. Some people believe that
art
 is not a vital subject.
Additionally
, individuals reckon that they waste their time when doing
art
.
Moreover
, there are a lot of people who are not capable of drawing .
Consequently
, they can feel
frustration
Replace the word
frustrated
show examples
 and useless. Definitely, it is not good. As well, for someone it could be just boring. From my perspective, it will be better to study the history of
art
 in general.
For
this
 reason ,
art
 make a tremendous influence on our life. Without
art
Add a comma
,art
show examples
 life would be mundane. So, even knowing a little bit about some crucial makes you feel intellectual and advanced.
To conclude
 ,
art
 is so controversial. Schools should have
this
 subject
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but do not put a big emphasis on it.
Submitted by slobodanatol83 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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