the plans below show a public park when it first onpened in 1920 and the same park today

The two plans shown are that of a public
park
. The first is showing how the
park
look ed
Correct your spelling
looked
show examples
when it was originally made, back in 1920. The second is showing how the
park
looks today. In the time that the
park
has
stayed
Add a comma
,stayed
show examples
there
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been many updates and a few things that have stayed the same. To start, the main
feature
in the middle of the
park
has been changed from having a water fountain in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
to having a lovely rose garden with a seating area all around it. Another obvious change is that of the old glass house.
This
has been removed and replaced by a different style of water
feature
. The new water
feature
seems like it was created not to be the main focus of the
park
, but an elegant
feature
that blends in well with its surroundings. I believe the biggest change to the
park
is the removal of the rose garden which was located on the
right hand
Add a hyphen
right-hand
show examples
side. It is now a cafe,
whch
Correct your spelling
which
shows how times have changed and how the designers were looking to see how they could make the
park
more modern and incorporate an area for people to sit down and enjoy food and drinks, giving them more of a reason to stay and embrace the nature around them. Only a couple of things have been kept the same over the period that the
park
has been around. The first
being
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
the two entrances to the north and the south of the
park
. The second
being
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
the rose garden on the
left hand
Add a hyphen
left-hand
show examples
side. Maybe
this
was left so there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
still some beautiful natural colours in the
park
. One thing that grabbed my attention when looking at the differences in the
park
was the fact that they updated the stage for musicians into an amphitheatre for concerts. I think
this
shows how the
park
has been transformed into more of a
modern
Correct quantifier usage
more modern
show examples
area for all ages to enjoy.
Submitted by mof.v914 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • recreational facilities
  • landscaping
  • naturalistic
  • amenities
  • formal gardens
  • ergonomic
  • symmetric designs
  • inclusive
  • accessible
  • accommodations
  • native plant species
  • societal changes
  • visitor services
  • community events
  • evolution
  • modern playgrounds
  • wildflower meadows
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