Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

In today's society, there is a common belief that having a lot of
money
is the main key to happiness.
This
essay will discuss how
people
become happy using a lot of
money
and
also
mention other ways to become happy in life. To commence with, there are some outcomes from having a lot of
money
which make folks pleased.
Firstly
,
people
can fulfil their dreams whatever they have in life.
For example
, rich
people
can buy
a
Change the article
an
show examples
expensive car and
also
they can establish a business from scratch.
In contrast
,
poor
Correct article usage
the poor
show examples
and middle man cannot think about those things which are very expensive.
Secondly
, high earners are making
money
from
money
.
For instance
, wealthy
people
are investing their
money
in the Stock Market, and they are becoming happy after receiving high return rates
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
money
.
Lastly
, rich folks might go anywhere in the world for
refreshment
Fix the agreement mistake
refreshments
show examples
and they live in five stars hotels.
Hence
, they thought
money
make them happy. Despite
this
, there are many other ways to live happily. One of that factors is
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
living with understanding.
In other words
,
people
who understand
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their family in every
situations
Change to a singular noun
situation
show examples
than
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
must possible that they can live without any stress and anxiety.
For instance
, it is really good if men understand the adverse situation of caring
women
Change preposition
for women
show examples
like the Menstrual Cycle, and they love them
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
that time.
Consequently
, that family
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
happily.
Moreover
,
people
are doing some regular exercise in the morning and become fresh should always stay healthy and gladly. In conclusion, some rich communities believe that the reason behind their happiness is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
. Even though
money
is one of the
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
to become happy in life, there are so many other factors which
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
important than
money
and
due to
that,
people
are living
happy
Change the adjective
happily
show examples
.
Submitted by writing7 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
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