Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In my country, young people have better lives than their parents had when they were young. Use reasons and examples to support your answer?

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It is commonly believed that the life of young people is very competitive and busy these days in my
country
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,
Korea
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.
Although
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this
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is true, I highly agree that we are lucky enough to have better lives than the generation of our
parents
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. In the 1970s, when our
parents
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were in their 20s,
Korea
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was a developing
country
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. The GDP was less than a third in comparison with that of today. Not only to respond to the demand of the world but
also
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to earn some money to feed their family, a large number of young adults participated in wars in those days, including the Vietnam War, resulting in a detrimental effect on their physical
as well as
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mental health which is still continuing to date.
In addition
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, the experience of the Korean War of their
parents
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, they have been living in fear of the occurrence of
the
Correct article usage
a
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second war.
According to
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recent research conducted in major universities in
Korea
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, it is revealed that the satisfaction which is the life of young people is pretty high in the
country
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. Approximately 90% of respondents agreed that they value work-life balance in their daily routine, which was almost the same figure as the satisfaction of their life.
Further
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, one of the significant things that makes them pleasant was the variety of cultural activities they can enjoy.
For instance
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, as K-pop became popular around the world these days, they can easily go to a concert to see a spectacular stage with K-pop celebrities. We cannot deny the fact that
Korea
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became a much better
country
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than several decades ago thanks to the devotion and sacrifice of the generation of our
parents
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.
This
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is not only our right to enjoy more but
also
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our duty to develop the
country
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better.
Submitted by minuri.kim on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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