Students from disadvantaged families and rural areas are finding it difficult to gat a university education. Some people believw that universities should help them. To what extent do you agree or diasgree?

Nowadays, a lot of

individuals

Use synonyms

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are disconnecting from modern society and they do not have

ability

Change the article

the ability

show examples

to study at universities and other educational institutions. There are many activists who claimed that universities should take responsibility

Change preposition

for

show examples

providing good quality

education

Use synonyms

. From my perspective, I support

these activist

Change the determiner

this activist

these activists

show examples

. So, in

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will

further

Linking Words

examine

this

Linking Words

thought-provoking question.

To begin

Linking Words

with, there are many benefits that outweigh the drawbacks.

Firstly

Linking Words

, if

person

Add an article

the person

a person

show examples

was born somewhere remote from the city in

rural

Add an article

a rural

show examples

area it does not mean that he or she is

dump

Correct your spelling

dumb

show examples

and stupid. They could be very

cleaver

Correct your spelling

clever

show examples

and have

passion

Correct article usage

a passion

show examples

for

education

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, these people

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are so motivated. One of the reasons why they are motivated is that they want to have a better life ,

change

Correct word choice

and change

show examples

theire

Correct your spelling

their

lifestyle and ambience in general.

Also

Linking Words

, these

individuals

Use synonyms

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are as well our future as those who live in cities and have access to normal

education

Use synonyms

Hence

Linking Words

, If we can provide

education

Use synonyms

for all classes from lower to upper classes we will decrease the level of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poverty in many countries. There are some solutions in order to unravel

this

Linking Words

issue. First of all ,

this

Linking Words

is not a big amount of money which is authority need to spend

due to

Linking Words

provide good quality of

education

Use synonyms

. The statistics show that two

billions

Correct your spelling

billion

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

dollars spend around the world every day on

army

Add an article

the army

an army

show examples

However

Linking Words

, we need only twelve billion

Change preposition

apply

show examples

dollars to supply

education

Use synonyms

for everyone who needs it around the world.

Consequently

Linking Words

, universities must pay for all amenities and

education

Use synonyms

for

individuals

Use synonyms

who

are need

Change the verb form

need

show examples

it.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, all educational institutions should create separate classes where people from villages and

Correct article usage

the countrysides

show examples

countrysides

Fix the agreement mistake

countryside

show examples

will be studying. Even construct new buildings for applicants. In conclusion,

education

Use synonyms

for people from

rural

Add an article

a rural

show examples

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

is so crucial

concidering

Correct your spelling

considering

that they are our future and all educational institutions should do everything possible for these

individuals

Use synonyms

slobodanatol83

Apr 19, 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

319 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

disadvantaged families
rural areas
university education
social equality
scholarships
mentorship programs
financial aid
outreach programs
enrollment
collaborative partnerships
pathways
educational goals
access to resources
transportation challenges

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Students from disadvantaged families and rural areas are finding it difficult to gat a university education. Some people believw that universities should help them. To what extent do you agree or diasgree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In more and more countries, people choose to give money on special occasions rather than giving gifts chosen personally. Why might this be the case? Is it a positive or a negative development?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

Some people think that the goverment is responsible for crime prevention. Others think that it is individuals responsibility to pretocet themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.