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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn, and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #tax
Indeed,
people
 work hard and earn wages for their needs and preferences. So they have the right to claim fair salaries for the work which they have done and keep whatever they want.
However
, we should not forget that
although
 we have rights, we are somewhat obliged to society in order to do that I believe that as a citizen, we have a moral obligation and responsibility to pay the tax from our earnings. In today’s world,
money
 is considered to be everything.
As every
Correct word choice
Every
show examples
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
 should spend
money
 on essential needs.
For example
, food, transport, medical bills, shelter and education are the basic expenses of citizens. Apart from that, many families tend to save and invest a significant portion of their income.
People
 always worry about their future and safety. On the basis of that point, some
people
 need to keep all their
money
 without allocating a pound to tax and they believe it is their right.
Nevertheless
, citizens should be obliged to pay taxes to the government for a number of reasons.
First,
taxes are collected for the sake of expanding and maintaining public services like infrastructure facilities, education, health services and transport.
In addition
 to that state
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
 to ensure the country’s security and keep the
stable
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
economy of the country. In short, through tax, which makes sure that everyone has affordable basic facilities and comfortable living standards.
To sum up
, even though many
people
 think that they should not pay the duty, a portion of that
money
 is useful to the stability of the country. It provides stability
as well as
 equal opportunities for every citizen. For that reason, we should neglect our duty to pay a contribution to the betterment of the country and society. So I totally disagree with the statement.
Submitted by nadeeshanishalika on

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task response
Ensure a more balanced approach to the topic, considering counterarguments and providing a comprehensive analysis of both perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to improve the coherence and flow of the essay.
lexical resource
Continue to expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and vividly.
grammatical range
Try to include more complex sentence structures and a wider range of grammatical forms to enhance the overall fluency and accuracy of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
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