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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many inhabited areas of the world have been affected by severe flooding in recent years. What are some of the causes of this phenomenon? What can be done to prevent it from happening?

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In recent years, over different parts of nations, flooding has been happening frequently. In fact, it occurs for specific reasons. In
this
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 essay, I will elaborate on the culprits and how can prevent floods.
To begin
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 with, it is a well-known fact that global warming contributes to severe flooding globally.
That is
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 to say, unexpected climate changes lead to serious flooding in the places where
people
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 live. These cases easily can be seen in some
areas
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such
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 as Malibu, Fiji, and other places in southern
areas
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 which suffer from climate changes frequently followed by flooding.
Moreover
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, indiscreet development in forests
also
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 affects flooding. It is because there is a lack of protection to block soils and water that flow to the habitat. Brazil,
for instance
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, which has had hardships
due to
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 indiscriminate development for decades has a difficult time on account of flooding every year. When it comes to solutions that prevent flooding, governments from different countries should make feasible actions by law. Thereby ensuring, nations could avoid
further
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 damage in inhabited
areas
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.
This
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 is exemplified by the Tokyo protocol which was introduced in 1997 and helped to enlighten
people
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 to be aware of global warming and its effect on preventing flooding.
Furthermore
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, we should make more efforts to protect plantations.
In other words
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, we need to know that
people
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 have a responsibility for harsh flooding. Many organizations around the world,
for example
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, set up their own channels and promote
people
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 to protect our forests. In conclusion, severe flooding has occurred
due to
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 global warming and indiscreet development in many other places. So, to protect our dwelling
areas
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, governments around the world should implement feasible laws and other related organizations should make efforts to protect our forests.

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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure, review the flow of ideas. Ensure transitions between paragraphs are smooth and logical. Additionally, be consistent with terminology and make sure all sections of your essay are equally developed.
task achievement
For task achievement, make sure to expand on the main points with more detailed explanations and examples. Clarify any slight ambiguities in your arguments to reinforce your stance.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the prompt and covers both causes and preventative measures effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-written and frame the essay nicely by giving a clear sense of the content and summarizing the main points effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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