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Band 7.5

The diagram below shows the average hours of unpaid work per week done by people in different categories. (Unpaid work refers to such activities as childcare in the home, housework and gardening.)

The diagram below shows the average hours of unpaid work per week done by people in different categories. (Unpaid work refers to such activities as childcare in the home, housework and gardening.)
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The bar graph illustrates the change in time to spend household-matter in a week in three different categories of
women
Use synonyms
 and
men
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. Generally, as the number of
children
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 is increased, it can be seen significant growth in
women
Use synonyms
's figures
while
Linking Words
men
Use synonyms
's are slightly decreased. Regarding the
figure
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 without
children
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,
women
Use synonyms
's
figure
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 shows 30 hours, and
this
Linking Words
 is more than third-two times of
men
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. The gap of
this
Linking Words
 time considerably grows as the number of
children
Use synonyms
 increases.
Women
Use synonyms
 who have one or two
children
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 consume the daily tasks for 50 hours per week,
while
Linking Words
 the result for
men
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 remains unchanged.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when they have three or more
children
Use synonyms
, the
women
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's
figure
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 reaches around 60 hours which is more than three times of
men
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's
figure
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. In conclusion, there is a huge difference in
time-related
Correct your spelling
time related
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 to the number of
children
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 they have. But
this
Linking Words
 trend could appear only for
women
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, and
men
Use synonyms
's figures did not change no matter how they had
children
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, men, children, figure with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • distribution
  • demographics
  • household responsibilities
  • societal expectations
  • norms
  • childcare
  • housework
  • gardening
  • contributions
  • family structure
  • cultural implications
  • social implications
  • work-life balance
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