Many think that religion should be taught in schools while others think it should be avoided. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
There has been growing debate and controversy surrounding religious education. Some assert that introducing
this
is favourable Linking Words
while
others argue that it is not. Linking Words
Although
that curriculum could provide Linking Words
students
with a deep understanding, I strongly agree with the latter point of view because it might brainwash their minds, resulting in unfavourable happenings Use synonyms
such
as murder.
On the one hand, proponents of introducing religion classes believe that Linking Words
students
are likely to develop well-rounded knowledge bases. Use synonyms
For instance
, teachers can teach a wide range of religious information including its history and belief through Linking Words
such
lectures for certain years. Actually, Linking Words
this
environment is preferred for Linking Words
students
in order to deep dive into it, Use synonyms
according to
a report from The University of Tokyo. Linking Words
However
, if some who already believed in a specific belief because of their family, were taught a different religion in lectures, Linking Words
this
would be a risk or meaningless time. Linking Words
Therefore
, it is not easy to implement Linking Words
this
class as a school subject.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, I believe that religious education could highly affect Linking Words
students
' ideas or thoughts. Use synonyms
In other words
, there are some possibilities that Linking Words
this
type of lecture might lead to brainwashing them. In fact, recent research conducted by The University of Tokyo discovered that what individuals had Linking Words
learnt
before Replace the word
learned
being
an adult strongly affected their perspectives. If religious education was driven by a teacher whose thought was antisocial, it would negatively impact his Verb problem
becoming
students
, which might cause serious incidents in the future. Use synonyms
Thus
, Linking Words
this
kind of curriculum should be avoided in schooling systems.
In conclusion, Linking Words
Whereas
teaching regions in schools has positive effects to some extent, I firmly believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. Linking Words
This
is because Linking Words
such
classes would determine individuals' perspectives and there is a risk that they might trigger undesired incidents.Linking Words
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clarity
Try to elaborate more explicitly the main points in the body paragraphs. Although it was understandable, the arguments could be clearer if they were laid out more directly.
evidence
Ensure that supporting examples are directly relevant and strongly support the argument being made. The link between religious education and events like murder wasn't explored in depth.
vocabulary
Avoid repeating phrases like 'this kind of' or 'this type of'. It will enhance the range of language used in the essay.